Insecure

John 15: 13-15
Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends. You are My friends if you do whatever I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you.”

Ask anyone who knows me well and they will tell you that I am a well of insecurities. I know that my friends love and value me. But I often worry about those outside my inner circle. It’s not uncommon for me to be in a group of people and think, “I bet no one wants to talk to me” or “What could I possibly say that would be interesting?” And so I sit, wondering what I can say or do that will be cool enough for me to fit in.

I recently joined Facebook, the website where “friends” can catch up, exchange information, share pictures, any number of cool things. My hang-up is this, I’m afraid to ask anyone to be my friend, because I don’t really think they’ll want to say yes. It’s silly, I know, but it’s true.

My husband thinks it’s ridiculous for me to feel this way. He loves to remind me that these are “virtual friends.” He points out all of the people I come into contact with on a daily basis who love me. He reminds me that I am valued by him, my children and God.

John tells us that we are God’s friend. He chose us, even before we were born. We are a part of his intimate inner circle. We are sealed with sign of the cross and marked at God’s own forever. Remember when you were a kid and made a secret club. Invariably there was a ritual involved in the initiation. You spit on your hands, pricked your finger or did some other equally disgusting thing shook hands and you were marked as a member of the group. God has done the same thing for us. The only difference is that instead of us pricking our fingers, he shed his own blood to mark us as his own.

If I focus on the things of this world, I will inevitably be insecure. I will never measure up, I will be rejected, I will feel left out. But when I focus on God, I am accepted. What a treasure! I am choosing to see myself through God’s eyes: loved, accepted and his friend. There is no insecurity in that.

Heavenly Father,
You have made us each unique. You have chosen us all to be your friends and heirs to your eternal kingdom. And yet, we, with human eyes, see only our flaws. We become insecure and unhappy with the person you have made us to be. We focus on worldly success and fail to remember that in you we cannot fail. Thank you for marking us as yours. Help us to remember that we are your friends, today, tomorrow and forever.
Amen